While celebrating my amazing Dad at the Cleveland Indians game tonight, my brother noticed a sign at the top of the stadium. Referencing the Indians’ outfielder Shin-Soo Choo, it read “Big League Choo!” For the rest of the night we traded puns that we might like to see on a sign celebrating this Korean big leaguer.
Here are the some of the best. [That could also mean: worst.]
It felt great to be back at a Tribe game. It had been a while.
2 weeks agoThere are some times that I might not mind an Orwellian present. Big Brother might come in handy in some certain situations.
Lets say you’re at a graduation. The idea is to hold your applause until the end so that the students who don’t have boisterous families don’t feel like total rejects. And yet, those boisterous families pull out the air horns and harmonizing screams. This is where Big Brother steps in to keep some order. The turrets in the center of the arena activate, senses the social disruption and immediately sends a tranquilizer dart into the loud mom’s neck. Maybe you’ll obey the rules next time and shut up.
Lets say you’re in a small office. The man next to you is thundering to an associate about supply chains over his cellular phone. Big Brother sensors activate a potent pepper spray that briefly incapacitates the social retard next to you. Maybe next time he’ll take it outside.
Lets say you’re walking down the street. You’re cruising at a pretty standard stroll when you come upon a number of elderly women monopolizing the sidewalk with what can only be described as a crawl. Instead of pushing past these gracefully aged ladies, Big Brother sends a few Ray Banned agents to move the women along with a simple fireman’s carry.
I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t mind giving up a few books to gain a society free of trivial interpersonal offenses.
3 weeks ago
Lord Baron Von Don Steely Eye Catfish Rastlin’ King Cones, aka The Grotto Monster.
He is a man among men.
3 weeks agoI was driving again today. The iPod was charged up this time, and I decided to indulge in my yearly summer tradition: Dave Matthews Band. I keep Dave in the metaphorical drawer for most of the year, but every summer him and his band of merry men [mostly Carter; but he has enough jolly to go around] make their way onto the speakers. It was the Golden Gate Park concert. The one I was at. That I actually attended on September 12th, 2004.
I started thinking about the albums/dvds that bands have released of shows that I’ve actually been at. I like to think that I have, in some miniscule way, been a part of that recording. That I’m on a few releases floating around out there. If they had credits for every cheer in the crowd, I’d be right there under the F’s.
If you’re wondering which specific releases they might be, I’d love to relay some of my experiences. These may or may not be in a specific order.
[ 01 ] Death Cab for Cutie, The Fillmore in San Francisco 05.04.04, The John Byrd EP
This was the first time I’d seen Death Cab and my first show at The Fillmore. Track 5, We Looked Like Giants, blew my mind and made it on this live compilation EP. I think we got the best track on the disc.
[ 02 ] John Mayer, Blossom Music Center in Cleveland 08.03.04, As Is [Ohio Disc]
The first stop on an epic road trip across the country. Maroon 5 opened. We had third row seats. My brother fought a girl for J May’s pick. He still has it. The next night we saw Dave Matthews in Nashville.
[ 03 ] Dave Matthews Band, Golden Gate Park in San Francisco 09.12.04, Live Trax Vol 2
I bought tickets for this “free” show on ebay for ten bucks each. We left at the crack of dawn to get there as early as we could because the whole show was general admission. Turns out we were still pretty far away, because the VIP section was huge. Still an amazing show, even if we baked in the sun all day. Dave played for three hours solid. It was probably my favorite set lists that I’ve seen him do live. You don’t get The Best of What’s Around everyday. Oh, and Santana made an appearance and played a few songs towards the back half of the set. Another thing about this show is that it was for charity. So, all the tickets were free and the beer cost 10 bucks a cup. The cups were printed with the date and a picture of the Golden Gate Park. I was positive they’d be collector’s items. So, after the show, we gathered up at least 200 of the dirty, used cups in trash bags. We cleaned them up and tried to sell them on ebay. I still have about 75 of them.
[ 04 ] Jack Johnson, Greek Theater in Berkeley 08.19.05, A Weekend At the Greek
I was only at the first night of the two nights that were filmed for the DVD. I remember not expecting much from Jack musically and him blowing me out of the water with a great great show. G.Love popped out for a guest appearance and ALO played more than a few songs with him. The DVD itself is awesome. Its got footage from the shows spliced with commentary and interviews with Jack and the band. I’ve watched it multiple times, and I can’t be sure, I’m pretty positive you can see me and the guys chillin in the back.
[ 05 ] Jason Mraz, Montalvo Winery in Saratoga 08.2006, Selections for Friends
It was a full band acoustic Mraz show at a mountain winery in the hills of Silicon Valley on a warm summer evening in august. It doesn’t get much better. He played some old classics, some acoustic versions of hits, and a cover or two. It was absolutely mind blowing. Afterword, we brushed past Toca hanging out with some fans. Sure, its only a digital download, but I definitely put it in my top shows of all time.
[ Honorable Mention ] Colin Meloy, Sings Live
I wasn’t at the show he recorded for this CD, but I was at the one the day before. He played almost the exact same set list, and his banter with the crowd was very similar. It doesn’t count officially, but I still feel a part of myself in the disc.
If you actually read this far, I’m impressed. Treat yourself to a Hostess snack cake. Maybe a HoHo.
3 weeks agoThe iPod I’ve been using on my 45 minute commute died 30 minutes in today. So, I used that opportunity to brush up my knowledge of current radio hits.
As I pulled into the parking lot, One Republic’s new chart topping smash hit single “Stop and Stare” played me into work.
When I got in the car to head home this afternoon, One Republic’s old chart topping smash hit single “Apologize” played me out of the parking lot.
I like to think that Erie’s Number 1 Hit Music Station Star 104 just played One Republic all day. One chart topping smash hit single after another.
3 weeks ago